Welcome to the Vatikot

“Hey, where is guard station 'blue'?” I asked a fellow soldier. Looking at me, he simply pointed, no response. Frustrated, I continued walking, before stopping another soldier, one I've never met, “Can you tell me how to get to 'blue'?” He pointed at a sign on the wall, but a word. We were the new tzairim (youngsters) in the vatikot, and the older soldiers had started their games.

Rewinding just a bit, I'd to like to explain the process of being absorbed into a new company after training. As I explained quite briefly, once training on the bach is finished, the entire draft moves together into what's known as the plugat maslool (training company). This company is considered the youngest of the warriors and spends a period of four months learning on the job, so to speak.

After the four months are over, the company is broken up and each soldier is absorbed into one of the vatikot, a new company with a specific specialty, made up of soldiers from a few different drafts. There, he will remain for the rest of his service.

After our Tekes Sof Maslool (a brief ceremony recognizing the end of your first year in the army), I, along with half of my pluga (company), were assigned our new pluga. Each platoon in the company has a specific task and needs to go through a course learning this specialty accordingly. I won't disclose the nature of my new company nor what we do, but after a short course learning the basics of our specialty, we joined the rest of the company on our new border.

We arrived to our border rotation, the Hermon mountains in the north, as the youngsters of the company. While we had to deal with the unique operational challenges of watching arguably the hottest border of Israel, we also quickly found out that each company has it's own traditions of seniority and games. After being essentially ignored for the first couple of weeks on our border, we understood entirely what was happening.

While the severity of these games differs everywhere and can sometimes cross the line in certain units, it can also be a fun aspect to the service, passing the time between mundane mindless tasks.

As youngsters, we were tasked with kitchen duties and the worst guard duties, essentially pulling triple our weight for our new company. Whenever there is work to do, it immediately falls on the shoulders of the tzairim, considering the vatikim (old soldiers) have already done their fair share. While it can sound unfair, the workload is certainly not unbearable and each platoon, old or young, still executes a large number of tasks. The youngsters simply receive the less appealing ones.

After some frustrating interactions, I found the “blue” station and finished one of my many guard duties to start my time as a deployed warrior. We understood why exactly we were being ignored. In the eyes of the vatikim, we had yet to truly sacrifice or “sweat” for the company, and therefore were not worthy of joining the family yet.

The sacrifice came soon after, during our masa aliya. Yes, another masa. After being entirely convinced I was done with the dreadful, torturous task known as the masa, we were told we needed to do one more, this time to earn our way into our new family.

And so it began. We arrived at the lowest point of a Hermon peak selected by the company, and up we climbed. We climbed and we climbed, exhausted, until we reached the top with our base in sight. Smiling, I exclaimed to a friend, “very hard, but we're done!” I was wrong yet again.

The officer in charge of the company arrived and led us to the ski lift. “Everyone on the ski lift, you're going back down.” We were shocked, but mostly amused. We rode the ski lift to the bottom, smiles on our faces due to the absurd change in course.

Still in good spirits riding the ski lift.

Up we went again, this time starting with three stretchers. We huffed and puffed, exhausted as we climbed, finding yet another stretcher. 

Before finding eight stretchers!

We continued, finding another along the path, then another, until we were up to eight stretchers. Everyone carried and no one could switch, we simply did not have enough people.

Our shoulders searing with pain and the legitimate thought on our minds that they may break, we persevered, once more climbing the mountain and edging closer to our base. As we were within a short run's distance, we noticed fire leading our way, our companies name spelled out in flames.

Then came the smoke grenades. Before we knew it, the vatikim, who had until this point been ignoring us, came running out, singing songs of the company and pushing us to the finish line, congratulating us as we went and hugging us as we finished. We had paid our first dues. We had been welcomed into the family.

-Brett

"Lonely" No More

Until this past October, I had the trying experience of being a chayal boded, a lone soldier. As I've touched upon more than once throughout the duration of this blog, being a chayal boded, despite the perks, is incredibly challenging. Whether it's after what can be considered an “easy” week in the army or after two weeks of being in the field, seeing the Israeli soldiers go home to their parents, home cooked food and already-done laundry, can make the perks pale in comparison

As of October, I am happy to announce, I am no longer a chayal boded. My mother has made aliyah. While her reasons are plenty, both common and unique to all new immigrants, she has settled into her new life with her partner rather quickly and the past few months with them have been incredible.

Understandably, most of the readers of this blog will be interested in how this massive and wonderful change will affect my service as a soldier, so I will do my best to keep on topic.

Gone are the double salary, the money each month for groceries, and the stipend for rent. I've also lost my right to a mandatory yom siddurim (errand day) each month. Considering my father still lives overseas, however, I've retained the right to fly once a year, albeit for twenty-one days instead of thirty.

Losing what were admittedly major benefits has been but a small price to pay. My quality of life has increased ten-fold. Being able to come home and hug my mother after a brutal stretch in the army, kick my shoes off and relax, used to be somewhat of a dream for me. All of that has certainly become a reality and I couldn't be happier.

While the benefits have dissapeared, so have the usual challenges I used to face on my typical weekend off: making it to the grocery store before it closes for shabbat, battling with twenty other soldiers for the use of the laundry machines, finding time and the energy to make food over the weekend, and just generally spending the entire time off trying to get by rather than recovering from the army.

I understand that until this point, my blog has been a story told through the eyes of a “lone soldier,” something some of you may have considered pursuing. While the story is now one of an American living with his brother AND a parent in Israel, it is still an entirely unique perspective, one I hope will be interesting and relatable to many of you. There are still many ups and downs to be had, and many challenges to be overcome.

The adjustment has been huge and I think it will reflect as such on the blog. The changes until now have only been for the better, however, and the difficulties of an army service will certainly be far more bearable as a result.

More posts coming soon!

-Brett

Coming Home

From the foggy airplane window, I gazed at the skyscrapers as they kissed the New York skyline, still half sure that I was dreaming. As the wheels scraped down on the tarmac, my heart skipped a beat. After ten grueling months, I had finally arrived home for my first approved visit.

The trip started as perfectly as I could have hoped, being that the ticket was paid for by the army! A short domestic flight later and I was back in Florida. It all seemed unreal. I was starting my month of freedom at home with friends and family. No commanders, no masaot, no guard duty, just being a civilian.

I would be lying if I said things weren't strange for me in the beginning. For the first few days, simply waking up on my own with no schedule planned for the day was an adjustment. More than that, however, was noticing that life at home had moved on despite my absence.

I'm sure anyone who's ever lived overseas can relate, but it's completely odd and slightly disconcerting to see how everyone's lives have simply gone on without you. It was certainly awkward for me to try and insert myself back into life at home, especially with the knowledge that I'd soon be leaving it once more.

After the initial shaky few days, however, I realized just how easy it was to slide right back into the swing of things. My best friends are still my best friends, my favorite restaurants still make my favorite dishes the same way, my dog still shakes when it rains. Everything was different, yet exactly the same, and I found my way back into life at home painlessly.

A visit to college definitely gave me a pang of nostalgia and a pesky case of the “what ifs,” but not regrets. I often entertain thoughts and daydreams about coming back to school, partaking full time in the life I experienced during my trip; studying the classes I'd like to study, partying with best friends, living on my own and making my own decisions. The visit undoubtedly made me run through these thoughts all over again, but never for one second have I regretted my decision.

While I had the time of my life living the “college experience,” it was plainly clear to me that my obligation right now is finishing my service, the meaningful commitment I've made to this country. College will always be there, but it's safe to say what I'm doing right now is a time sensitive, once-in-a-lifetime experience.

Time was also made on my trip for family and friends at home, as well as an unbelievable vacation cruise to Mexico. This was the complete opposite of the army and was everything I needed to reset myself before coming back and jumping right back into the grind that is my combat service.

My only regret from my month off was not maximizing my time to see everyone and do everything as planned during my ten months in the army. So I took a couple of vacation days to sit at home and do absolutely nothing, who can blame me?

In true closing cliché fashion, all things good must come to an end. Before I knew it, I was sitting on the flight back to Tel Aviv. While I had expected it to be an upsetting flight, I actually came back with excitement and a bit of a spring in my step. I came back excited to see friends and resume my life (even the army). Most exciting, however, was the massive news that my mother would be arriving the following day, after making the huge decision to live in Israel, something I'll touch upon extensively in the next post.

The month off afforded to lone soldiers is simply indescribable. It's both desperately needed and entirely earned. I am constantly amazed at the rights afforded to those who give up their lives at home to serve the army. These are the things that keep us going.

Until next time!

-Brett

A Sincere Apology

This post will not be one about experiences over the past couple of months in the army, but rather an apology to the readers of this blog.

I understand that the usual excuses for not writing on a timely fashion (being unusually busy, no access to computers, etc) are tired and not entirely valid, so I'm going to refrain from those. Rather, I'd like to do my best to justify my absence to my readers, and myself if possible, in the most honest and sincere way I know how.

The army, as I've tried to touch on previously, is an experience full of ups and downs. As a combat soldier, you physically and mentally exert yourself to the fullest on a daily basis and can experience the highest of highs as well as the lowest of lows. Your perspective on life and everything in it can change two hundred times over the span of one day, or even over the span of a two hour guard duty.

My point in mentioning this is that you can often find yourself in a place you've never found yourself before. You can learn things about yourself that quite frankly, you never wanted to learn. This can and usually does cause many issues, notably a significant decline in motivation, in the army as well as other areas of your life.

I've found myself in somewhat of a rough patch over the past few months.... Okay, in the spirit of being honest with myself and my readers, there have been periods of time over the past few months in which my shvizut (army sadness), and general outlook on things have reached extremes and there's no shame in admitting that at times, it's caused a bit of depression. Any combat soldier who has spent months cooped up in an outpost on a remote border doing static guard duty all day with no sleep can relate to this. If he can't, he's usually lying.

With this has come, as I've mentioned, a big lack of motivation which reflects both in my army work and how I feel about it when I come home for the always welcomed weekend off. I've been generally reluctant to discuss the army with family and friends, as thinking about it has just spurred on the negative feelings that I've been having. Over the past few months, I've seen my time at home as a complete break from everything and any army talk has been pushed far out of the equation. Regretfully, that has included writing about my experiences, despite this journal being followed by friends, family, and strangers alike at home.

I've thought about this issue quite a bit recently. With the ever-changing perspectives that come with my army experience, I've learned from these difficult lessons and moved forward a stronger person. I understand that from darkness comes light and in true army roller coaster fashion, much better experiences have emerged as a result of the negative ones. I'm continuing to learn and grow as a soldier and a man.

While I regret that this blog has fallen by the wayside, I've decided to revive it to the best of my ability for any of the readers still out there. The good andthe bad, the sadness and the elation, I will be documenting the rest of my service as honestly as I can. As a blogger, it's important not only to earn back the trust of my readers, but also rely on these posts once again as a form of therapeutic reflection for myself as well.

I have to apologize one last time, this time for the very negative tone of this post. I assure you since the last time I've posted, there have been plenty of joyous occasions and I will be filling in all of the blanks.

Wishing a perfect start of the summer to all of my readers and looking forward to a new start.

-Brett